I feel like I have to relearn this one over and over again. Perhaps I’ll get it soon. I so easily put my worth in to other things or people. I look for approval. I get hung up on the result. I find myself stressed out and overworked because I’m trying to prove something. And then I hit a wall and realize how tired I am and that I’m just creating a lot of busyness.
I recently did a training call on this subject because I believe it is the single biggest obstacle to true success. I’m not talking about the kind of success where you live and breathe your career and have no time or motivation for anything else. I’m talking about the well-rounded kind of success. The one that includes family, self-care, and great results.
I did the training call just as much for myself as for the recipients. If you look at the fruit or the product of getting validation from results or from people the results are eye opening. The fruit of this is a fear of failure or it could be a fear of success. A fear of risk, fear of commitment, missed opportunities, and circumstances tend to dictate direction. All in all it ends in insecurity and stress. Why? For me it’s because if I actually believe that a result or someone’s approval holds the power to give me some kind of validation or worth then I am truly prey to what is around me. If things are good then that means I’m worthy if they’re not then that means I’m not worthy. Perhaps its a relationship or the outcome of a project or my ability in comparison to someone else. It’s futile.
Yet, if I look at my worth being rooted in God, I now have a different outcome. The truth is that my/your worth is built on a solid foundation. It’s the love of God. I am worthy because God loves me. God’s love for me never changes. Therefore I am always worthy. No circumstance can change that solid fact. Now the world looks much different.
The fruit of God rooted worth is beautiful. Now a poor result becomes an opportunity. Instead of being self-focused I am other- focused. I am not afraid to take risks because the result has no bearing on who I am. I am grateful, I see the victories and am confident. I am also teachable (humble), patient and committed. My outer circumstances do not determine my direction only that still small voice does. Because we all know that there are times we need to keep going even when everything around us looks bleak. We cannot do that if our value is tied up in those circumstances. We will stop dead in our tracks. Interestingly enough, most of the great things we are called to do require us to persevere in adversity. If we believe that our outcome determines our worth, we won’t be able to persevere. Most importantly, we achieve success. When it is not an idol, success (the well-rounded kind) is actually attainable.
I don’t mind that it’s taking me some repeated learning to internalize this. I’m willing to go through whatever it takes to get it. I trust that I need this training to go where God wants me to. He loves me enough to prepare me for the road ahead. One only made possible by His love and His power. For that I am ever grateful.
